Everyone keeps trying to set us up, they tell me how wonderful we'd be together. They look at me, expectantly ... as if any of this is in my hands. All I know is that you couldn't see what I could see, what everyone else sees & there's nothing I can do ..

Am I crazy for 'falling' for you?
Am I lame for praying that you change your mind?
Am I a fool for hoping you'll open your eyes?
Am I in denial for refusing to accept your casual dismissal and believing that its not me, but the duty you feel towards your older brother & wanting him to get married first?
Am I going against everything I ever believed in for wanting to change myself so you'll change your no?

Yes probably, to all of that. But for you, I'm willing to be all of those things. Because it really fucking stings when everyone keeps banging on about you to me & there's nothing I can do about it. 

⇢ You're gonna have to tell me the complete kahani. He said no? Or does he nnot even look?
You can reply in the gazillion emails that are pending (no pressure).

⇢ We were at some wedding and my mum got excited (despite us having a discussion & deciding I will casually get to know him aka flaunt my awesome personality) and I think spoke to some aunty, or some aunty got excited and mentioned me to him & asked what he thought of me & he said I would be good for his older brother.

*cry*

But different people all keep telling me about him as if I can do anything about it. So anyway I've decided (maybe stupidly) to let my close friend R, whose brother Mr A is apparently best friends with, play match maker because she's all you're perfect for each other (I KNOW!!!) & wants to set us up.

Persistency or denial .. time.will.tell.

*sigh*